Tuesday, May 24, 2011

The Blurry Line Between Religious Faith & Dementia



When I first started this blog, there were some topics that I had planned to avoid, namely religion as I've always believed that arguing or debating about religious beliefs on the internet was the definition of idiotic. However now that Saturday May 21st, 2011 has passed and we're all still here, I really believe it's something that needs to be addressed.

As you've no doubt know by now, May 21st has come and gone and obviously if you're reading this, Harold Camping's prediction of the rapture fell a little short.

Camping claimed earlier this year that, based on his calculations, the Rapture, God’s Day of Judgment, the end of the world is coming on May 21. At around 6 pm that day, roughly 2 percent of the population will be “raptured”, carried away to Heaven. The rest will go to the euphemistic “Other Place”. Camping, an 89-year-old former engineer, has spread his message far and wide, via the Family Radio Network, a religious broadcasting organization that subsists entirely on listener’s contribution, The Independent reported. Boasting assets at around $120 million, the network owns 66 stations in the US alone and has launched an international advertisement campaign regarding the May 21 rapture, from billboards in Atlanta to London Tube stations to a be-logoed camper van traveling around America.

Of course Camping's prediction had a solid basis and foundation, he based it on.. well what else THE MAGICAL BIBLE! Because really- a fictional book written by man thousands of years ago is so relate-able to today's society- especially predicting the end of it.

Now I could go on and on about how ridiculously stupid the prediction was and ridicule Harold Camping like thousands of people have already done, but I think there is something that the media has missed here, shocking I know- instead of focusing on the 89 year old Camping I'd like to shift the attention to the numerous people all across the world who believed this shit.

People all over the world really believed that the earth was going to open up and swallow sinners- they quit their jobs in preparation for this, they took out loans on their homes and went nuts maxing out their credit cards figuring they wouldn't have to pay it off.. Then there was fire-fighter Jeff from Long Island who ordered a pizza at 4:43 and asked them to hurry because there "might not be enough time to eat it". It concerns me that these people are allowed to roam free in our society, out wandering the streets- they belong locked up in the fucking looney bin.

But of course they're not locked up are they? They get to go around spouting off all of their trash and nonsense, and they're free to do so under the wonderful umbrella of FAITH.

Here's a scenario for you, imagine you were out walking down the street and I came up to you and said the unicorns are coming and they are bringing the dinosaurs and then it's going to rain for 40 days in a row so we better take cover now and I know all of this because my Dog told me. If you could contain your laughter you'd tell me to get the fuck away from you and if there was an officer nearby you'd probably flag him down and tell him I needed psychiatric care.

Yet people flock to Church on a weekly basis to hear stories about an invisible grand wizard who lives on a private island in the sky who is able to watch every single one of us every moment of every day. Now I admit, I love a fabulous fairytale just as much as the next guy and in all honesty the idea of being able to watch anyone at anytime is rather.. perverse albeit somewhat arousing. However the fact remains it's nothing more than an unproven fairytale and the fact that real people put their belief into this junk is horrifying to me.

You're allowed to believe whatever you want to, if you want to believe in a magical wizard or Unicorns or 5 headed monsters you can do that, but how dare you try to shove your bullshit beliefs down my or anyone-else's throat. I'd prefer to stay in the real world where I have proof of what I do and don't believe in. Personally I stopped having an invisible friend in my childhood, shame more people couldn't make that break.

I think it's important to stress that I don't have the answers, I have plenty of questions myself about this planet that I will probably never have answered. I don't know if there is anything beyond this life-- but you know what? Neither do those fucking sky pilots who pretend they're messengers from the magical wizard teaching "his words" on weekly basis-- that is when they're not busy in the back with the alter boys.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Don't Support Gay Marriage? Then Don't Marry A Gay!




Originally, I wasn't even going to address this issue as it was one of the few things that I felt didn't need addressing here in 2011. Apparently I was wrong, this all stems from NHL player Sean Avery's controversy from late last week. Avery, an absolute prick on the ice, spoke out supporting gay marriage. That lead to NHL Player Agent Todd Reynolds to TWEET:

“Very sad to read Sean Avery's misguided support of same-gender ‘marriage,’ ” and that, “Legal or not, it will always be wrong.”

Seriously What. The. Fuck. In this day and age do people have nothing better to do than complain about gay people wanting to get married? Not that it matters, but I should point out I'm 100% straight as an arrow, I have numerous restraining orders to prove this fact- but again that's irrelevant to the point. If Gays want to marry, who the flying fuck cares?

It never ceases to amaze me the bullshit reasons people give for beyond against gay marriage. In some way shape or form they always bring it back to the bible, which in all honesty could be a separate blog rant in itself as it's a fucking mystery to me how something "written" thousands of years ago has any bearing on what happens in today's society- but alas I'll save that rant for a later time.

One of the biggest points of these bible-thumpers are that allowing gays to marry would violate the sanctity of marriage.......


ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME


The sanctity of marriage? Have you fucking read the stats on marriage these days? 50% of 1st marriages FAIL. The other 50% just need time to fail, It seems to me that the fucking heterosexuals are doing just fine at destroying that precious sanctity of marriage.

Why not go protest the god damn Maury Povich show which I happened to be watching the other day, not that I make a habit out of watching that garbage, but when you're sick with the flu it can be quite mesmerizing. Anyways the wonderful heterosexual couple had to have a paternity test to prove who the baby's father was... and then he proposed to the fucking whore. I'm sure that's going to last.

Or if you really need someone to rally against, why not celebrities? Here are a few examples of fantastic celebrity marriages:

  • Britney Spears and Jason Alexander (not the douche from Seinfeld), 2 days
  • Carmen Electra and Dennis Rodman 6 days
  • Jeremy Thomas and Drew Barrymore 29 days
Remind me again how the sanctity of marriage is going to be harmed by allowing gays to marry?

Personally I'm all in favour of gay marriage, in fact I wish more men would turn gay. Why, you ask? Simple, for every man that turns gay, my chances and odds with the women on this planet get better and better.

This is another example of people shoving their views where they don't fucking belong, really, who gives a fuck if two men or two women are happy together, just fucking let them be and go back to your boring miserable life you fucking idiots.



A Couple Of Quick Notes:

  1. For any ladies wondering, I've never had a restraining order, so if you find yourself turned on by this blog, and honestly I'm not sure how you couldn't be, please don't hesitate to send your personal details to me.
  2. Sanctity is a fun word to type, any time I get to type tity is a good day for me.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Sick Of High Gas Prices? Tough Shit


It seems that latest public outcry is concerning the raising gas prices, it's such an outcry that the Federal Government is going to stop doing whatever it is they do and actually look into it. (full article here)

Here's an idea, instead of bitching and moaning for the Government to step in and regulate the prices, Why don't you people...


LEAVE YOUR FUCKING CAR AT HOME AND WALK YOU FUCKING OBESE WANKERS.

But that would be just too fucking simple, wouldn't it? It's 2011, society is all about ME ME ME, people think driving a car is a god-given right rather than a fucking privilege. How could you ever live without your precious little automobile?!?! Giving it up would require SO MUCH FUCKING EFFORT and we can't have that, can we?!?!

People conveniently forget that the gas companies are a business, a very fucking profitable business and like me, they don't give a flying fuck about you. Their sole purpose on this earth isn't to make sure you can fill up your piece of shit car and get to the Drive-Thru at McDonalds. They have every right to charge whatever they see fit for gas, if you don't like it don't fucking pay it asshole.

This is nothing more than supply and demand. It's simple economics that I learned in high school, of course people are idiots so what the fuck can I expect? The higher the demand is for a good, the higher the fucking price is going to be. Why should they charge $0.50/litre if you morons are perfectly willing to pay $1.50+ per litre? Some people may call that greed, but in reality it's just a fucking solid business model. So if you really want something done about these "outrageous" gas prices, stop taking your fucking car and refuse to pay for gas. Use public transit, walk, crawl, I don't give a fuck just stop whining about the price of gas. But of course that will never happen because you're all fucking sheep and you couldn't possibly live without your automobile?!?!?!?!?!? Just know that the higher the gas prices go the more you'll pay and the more I'll be sitting here laughing at you.

Personally I don't drive, for a myriad of reasons. For one I value my life and don't trust you idiots handling a 3,000 pound machine of death. Then of course I enjoy having a shitload of extra disposable income each and every month since I don't have to shell out hundreds of dollars for gas, and lastly but certainly not least is the added bonus of being able to say to anyone that No, I don't drive I actually care about our environment and future generations on this planet. Even if it may not be the 100% truth, it's fun to say with a big shit-eating grin.

To those of you that think the Government is actually going to step in to "regulate" The industry, think about it this way. Every dollar of profit these companies make, they pay taxes on and every tax dollar goes to the Government.. yeah I'm sure it's really in the Government's best interest to lower these prices!! fucking idiots.

It's been a while since I had a solid rant post like this one. There will be many more to come over the next few weeks, so if you don't like it, go pound sand.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Ruth Ellen Brosseau Makes Mockery Of Canadian Political System, Yet Manages To Win


For anyone unaware, Canada had an election last week. Last Monday night to be exact. The Conservative party, led by Stephen Harper, (who is endorsed by http://www.ihatesaturday.com) won in an over-whelming majority. However the major story of the election was the dramatic surge in seats that the NDP won.


Last Election This Election Change
Conservatives 143 167 +24




Liberals 77 34 -43




NDP 36 102 +66


I could go into detail about how I think Jack Layton is so far in over his head it's not even funny or I could begin ranting and raving at how stupid the Liberal party was for nominating Michael "I love Harvard" Ignatieff as their leader, how they probably would have won more seats if they nominated a winner from the Special Olympics instead, but there is a much much better story to come out of this 2011 Canadian Election. A story that I believe personifies this website and every single thing it stands for, the message it conveys on a daily basis, which is People Are Idiots and that story is the story of Ruth Ellen Brosseau. (full documentation here).

Ruth Ellen Brosseau is a 27 year old single mother who was working as assistant manager for Oliver's Pub, a bar on the campus of Carleton University located in Ottawa. She won the riding of Berthier-Maskinonge in Quebec which is a predominantly francophone riding. On the surface, that's a pretty impressive story isn't it? There's only a couple tiny problems.

SHE'S NEVER VISITED THE RIDING NOR IS SHE FLUENT IN FRENCH.

If that's not bad enough, during the campaign (which unlike the American one that goes on for years, our lasts only a couple of weeks) Instead of going door to door to get the message out or actually VISITING THE FUCKING RIDING SHE WAS RUNNING IN, this chick decides to head to LAS VEGAS FOR HER BIRTHDAY.......And the icing on the cake is she's going to make almost $160,000 as an MP... all on the taxpayers dime.

WHAT THE FUCK, QUEBEC?!?!

How the fuck does something like this happen? This should be a complete embarrassment to every citizen in this Country. It should also serve as proof that the NDP is in completely over their head as they let anyone with a pulse run for them. But once again there is a bigger picture here, and that's the fact that 22,484 people voted for someone they had never met and obviously had no knowledge of whatsoever. She can't even speak the same language for fuck sake.

It's bad enough that only 61% of the people bothered to go and vote, it's worse when people go with absolutely no knowledge of the candidates running and blindly support a party. Then these are the same people that will be bitching for the next five years that things aren't changing and the vicious cycle of human stupidity goes round and round and round.

As for Ruth Ellen Brosseau, "Brosseau said she plans to get a tour of her riding from a local mayor in the next few days. "I've heard it's a beautiful place and everybody has been so friendly and I've received so many emails of outreach," she said."

I wonder who translated the emails into English for her.

This. Fucking. Country.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

The Questions Surrounding Osama Bin Laden's Death


Originally I had planned this blog post to be about the recent Canadian Election and the surge of the NDP here in Canada-- instead I find myself fascinated with the on going story of Osama Bin Laden's death. If you haven't read the comments on my previous post, please be sure to check them out. Now lets get to the juicy story.

I am completely convinced that Osama Bin Laden is dead, not a question in my mind, however what I do question is when he actually died. There are just too many things that don't add up for me, the purpose of this post is to examine the things that don't add up and hopefully gain some feedback.
The Timing Of The Announcement:

Before Obama's announcement, he was mired in a birth certificate controversy (a controversy I thought was ridiculous but it was there nonetheless) , the US dollar was falling fast and furious as was his approval rating.

The announcement was made Sunday night, another stroke of amazing luck as it made sure that all of the weeks headlines focused on Osama's death, all the other problems took a backseat to the major news of Osama's death and a sense of patriotism (no matter how false it may be) was restored to the USA. Now, today as of this writing, Barack Obama is at Ground Zero, honouring 9/11 victims, spreading American pride and of course, taking advantage of numerous photo ops.

It sure seemed to happen at the perfect time for this Administration.


The killing of Osama:

First, during the president's initial announcement, we were told a vicious fire fight ensued and Osama was armed and had to be shot to death. Then we were told no no, he was a coward and was using his wife as a human shield.. But once the question was asked why did you have to shoot him? the story changed once again to

Leon Panetta director of the CIA, told "PBS NewsHour" that bin Laden "made some threatening moves" that "represented a clear threat to our guys."

threatening moves? like what? reach for the keys to a 747? Ask them if they wanted to save money on car insurance?

Why not just release the video and let us see for ourselves, why is the story constantly changing?

Release Photographic Evidence?

Speaking of not releasing things, Obama decided that no pictures that would actual prove they killed Osama would be released because the photo was "gruesome" and that "it could be inflammatory" if released.

Too gruesome? In 2011? Have you seen the shit they put on CSI from week to week? Society eats up gruesome bullshit, besides they had no issue parading the pictures of Saddam and his two dead sons, oh but this picture might be inflammatory!!! I can really see some angry al-qaeda member sitting around thinking well they didn't show pictures so I'm not mad anymore are you fucking kidding me? You call a press conference at 11pm on a Sunday night to stand there pounding your chest about how you've finally killed Osama Bin Laden and USA #1 yet you won't offer up a picture to prove the bullshit you're spouting because a picture might be too INFLAMMATORY?!?!

One picture that the President was more than happy to release was this one. When it was released, the media was quick to make it an iconic photo stating that the people in the photo were watching the raid as it happened, however according to CIA direction Leon Panneta:
Once those teams went into the compound I can tell you that there was a time period of almost 20 or 25 minutes where we really didn't know just exactly what was going on. And there were some very tense moments as we were waiting...

So the iconic photo may not be that iconic at all, but why would the media let facts get in the way of a real feel-good story!

DNA and Burial at Sea:

It's mighty impressive that the USA was able to do such a quick DNA test to know for a fact it was Osama Bin Laden that they had killed, I was always under the impression it took 12-24 hours for a DNA result, but I guess the USA has super fast laboratory services, so I'll let that slide.

The Burial at Sea however is awfully convenient, and I don't know about you, but I'm really glad they gave him a proper Muslim burial, I mean since he suffered since a proper Muslim Death (an alleged gun shot to the skull) good thing they gave him the whole nine yards and as an added bonus with the burial at sea they get to go oops! body ALL GONE!.

No matter what you believe in regards to when or where Osama Bin Laden died, I think the one thing we can agree on is the US Government has handled this whole situation extremely poorly.


Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Osama Bin Laden Is Killed, Americans Lose Ability To Think Rationally


Barack Obama accepting the Nobel Peace Prize, 2009




Before I begin my rant, there are a few things that I feel I need to state.


I am going to assume, for the purpose of this blog post, that Osama Bin Laden is in fact dead and was killed Sunday May 1st, 2011. Before you ask, yes I've seen all the news reports, parts of the Presidents speech and Americans celebrating like there was no tomorrow. However what I did not see was any proof. Not that I necessarily want to see pictures of a dead Osama but it would be nice to have actual tangible proof, other than just the President telling me so. Normally I would say the Presidents statement would be enough but I remember a few years back another President telling me all about weapons of mass destruction that Iraq had....

I also find the timing of this, being a few days after the release of Obama's birth certificate to be incredibly beneficial to this Administration, as well the burial at sea certainly doesn't do anything to stop the conspiracy theories that will no doubt pop up in the coming days and weeks. But that's not what this site is about, it's about the fact that people are idiots.

So now that we've established that Osama Bin Laden is, in fact, dead. I have one question

HOW DOES THAT CHANGE ANYTHING?

Before I get put on the terrorist watch list, I better make it clear I am in no way saddened by the death of Bin Laden, and in all honesty it's probably a benefit for this world that someone so filled with hatred is no longer on this planet-- however the reaction to the news of his death is quite mind boggling.

What people seem to be forgetting is the fact that the War on Terror is not over. The TSA body scanners aren't going anywhere, the numerous restrictions for flying are not being loosened, this was a small "victory" in a large global war. It certainly did not call for people rallying outside the White House chanting USA! USA! Perhaps if they were chanting WHAT TOOK SO LONG that would have been more appropriate. Osama was on the run for almost 10 years, other than crowning him the greatest Hide-and-Seek Champion of all time, I'm not sure what all the flag waving & chest thumping was for.

Puzzled by the reaction to the news, I did what anyone living in 2011 would do- I took to the social networks to see what people thought, after reading a countless number of posts celebrating as if the war was over, I thought I would attempt to respectfully provide a small dose of reality, so I posted
Other than the sweetness of revenge, sadly this really doesn't change anything about the world we live in.


To which I got this gem of a response:

I don't care about revenge. I knew someone who kissed her 3 year old son goodbye and went to work and never came home. That kid is 13 now. Think about what he lost. I care about justice and closure for him and everyone like him.

Justice and Closure. Two buzzwords that the media couldn't wait to infuse into this event. Yes the visual of a 3 year old losing their mother in the attacks is a horrible one and one no one should have to experience. But please explain how the murder of a man in Pakistan gives him anything that resembles closure- His mother isn't coming back, the pain he experiences isn't going to suddenly vanish, and anytime the calendar comes close to September, it will be a constant reminder of what happened, with a tragedy like the 9/11 attacks, there will never be true closure.

Justice is a funny one, the Americans love their legal system, INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY they proudly claim anytime one of their celebrities gets arrested for something.. funny I don't remember Osama getting a trial, I'm in no way saying he isn't responsible, but what I am saying is it's amazing how easily and quickly we'll bend the rules when it suits our own objective. It certainly sets a very dangerous precedent for our children and our future.

In the end, almost 10 years later, the US finally got their man. Personally I don't believe in wildly celebrating the death of another human being- but some people can, and that's their prerogative. But if you are, at least acknowledge it for what it is, don't pretend that all is forgotten, everyone can move on with their lives, and the victims of 9/11 have their closure or justice, that was and always was about vengeance and revenge.

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Tornado Rips Through The South, Mother Nature Proves She Is Still Boss

There's a good chance if you have a pulse, you've heard about this but just in case you haven't, the full story is here.


The grim death toll from the 24-hour storm period continued to rise, with 294 counted in six states. Nearly 1 million customers were without electricity.


It's times like this that really show that we, as people on this planet, are so insignificant it's not even funny. Now I know that may be difficult for people with unique snowflake syndrome to hear, but the truth is it's 2011 and really how advanced are we as people?

We can't find a cure for something as basic as the common cold, much less find cures for serious diseases such as Aids or Cancer. We can't prevent Tornado's, Tsunami's or Hurricanes and hell we can't even predict Earthquakes, much less do anything to prevent them... but that's okay because on my cellphone I can see what movies are playing at theaters around me, that's good right?? It's too bad the almost 300 dead didn't have the "Tornado avoidance" app on their smartphones...

I don't mean for this to be a dark and gloomy post, or to make light of the disaster, but really, where did this planet lose it's way? Today we're so fucking obsessed with such nonsense like the royal wedding (which will be a whole blog rant in itself later this week). We crave such horseshit drama like "reality" tv when in fact it contains no reality at all. We cling to social networking like it's important. How many of you have updated your facebook/twitter/myspace/whateverthefuck in the past 6 hours? The worst part? I have too. I have a twitter for this very blog (cheap plug time http://www.twitter.com/ihatesaturdaycm) and a facebook under a nom de plume- where all I do is plug this blog as much as I possible can and hell I even a facebook page for this blog! (facebook.com/peopleareidiots). But the sad reality is, in this day and age, if I want people to read this blog I have to! We live in a day and age where people think updating with "Sushi for dinner, yum yum" or "UGH. Boss is making me stay late! darn!" is important and once again we've lost sight of the bigger picture.

This blog post really took some turns considering it started out with the tornado disaster and ended with me complaining about social networking. So I guess if there's something you should take away from this post, it's the fact that people are idiots.. We are major fucking idiots.

Once again, we can't see the Forrest for the trees.. sadly that seems to be a running theme of this century.